My Nigerian Upbringing

Back home in Nigeria its never unusual to 'spank' a child when he is wrong. The culture truly speaks of sparing the rod and spoiling the child. My younger brother and I never experienced any form of beating from our Mother as my older siblings claimed. Our father was the cool parent always there to make you happy. They always said "you two were born when Mummy was Old". They always had interesting stories of sneaking out the house to play with friends and how they were caught. They were not allowed to be out of the house. They were had forced afternoon nap after school and compulsory reading. But that doesn't mean that we didn't have more interesting things to say.

It sounds funny in my head as I smile to write this story. Having a Mother that didn't spank me didn't mean that She was old. My never gets old. Her strength is being renewed everyday. I actually see it as she gets younger everyday. The reason for her not spanking us was because she worked till late and came hem just in time for the dinner and family daily night devotion. Now that doesn't mean that I wasn't spanked. Oh! No!!. There is more to the story. Which Nigerian cultured child wasn't? LOL. Everyday after school I was home with these set of people which I termed to be evil. Their common name was 'Aunties'. To me they wee just wicked. They always said "Thats how Mummy trained us too, we have to train you too". I felt they were exaggerating the way my mother treated them. The only harm my mother could cause was to shout. And when I say shout I mean it was loud enough to wake everybody up in the house or call your name from few houses away. That was a super power.

My Aunts forced us t study, Spell, read and write. By the time I was in Primary 5 I could comfortably calligragh with both hand while taking notes in school. Their reaction to indiscipline was so fast we taught we were being beaten ahead of a crime to be committed. Her best weapon was Slippers and 'Sheku' (Kilba word for wooden spoon used to stir tuwo). The way and manner those items appeared in their hands was unbelievable. Before you could imaging the scene the movie was over. The closest comparison I have is the movie THOR when he stretches his hand to grab his hammer.

Before going t secondary school, I saw the significance of all thisThe first time I was top in class I ran to my Aunt first to show her the result. She smiled and said "thats why we are always hard on you". I was so happy that day. Her smile showed fulfilment. There was joy in her eyes. She was married then with a daughter who just started kindergarten. You can't just imagine the pressure that was upon her daughter to read. LOL. Her daughter was unbeaten all her days in Primary school. Today she is in JSS3 and still keeps a high standard in her education. I know that impacting the right discipline in a child based on example and leadership is the best investment anybody can give. You also train generations to train you own generations. My Mum didn't have to pay for a private lesson teacher to achieve that. It was all for free. For me it wasn't for free because it was a horror at that time. 11 years later I'm still seating down to do the same things I was forced to learn.

 I know my parents are proud of me. Even if they didn't directly give the training they wanted for me. They gave it indirectly and It gave a perfect result. I know a lot of people around the world can relate to my story. If you think investing in a child is too much work. Read my story again

Parry Hedima
parryhedima.blogspot.com